All About Spike

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy: Spike
By Mezz

Rating: PG-13 There's a lot of sexual innuendo, but that's about it.
Summary: The Fab Five come to Sunnydale to give Spike a makeover in an effort to win back Buffy.
Spoilers: This takes place in a kinder, gentler version of S6 after Spike and Buffy break up.
Feedback: Pretty please!
Notes: Miriam is a beta goddess. Any mistakes you see were made after she'd read it.

It was a crisp New York morning when five men emerged from their stylish brownstone and ran for their car.

“C’mon guys, we’re heading to Sunnydale, CA. We’ve got a straight guy to save!” one of the men yelled as they piled into the black SUV bearing a license plate that read ‘Fab 5’. With a screech of tires, they pulled out into traffic.

“Fab Five to the rescue. Who’s our guy?” Kyan Douglas, the Grooming Guru, asked from the backseat.

Jai Rodriguez, also known as the Culture Vulture, pulled out his palm pilot and tapped a few buttons. “His name is Spike.”

“Spike?” Thom Filicia, the Fab Five’s Design Doctor, interrupted. “That’s it? No last name?”

“How very Cher,” Fashion Savant Carson Kressley said archly. “But if he’s cute, I’ll show him a spike,”

Jai scrolled down and continued to read out loud. “There’s no age, but it says that he’s 5’10 and weighs 170 pounds and is a fashion disaster and that he wears the same outfit everyday.

“One outfit? Probably just looks that way because he doesn’t know how to colorize,” Carson said, unfazed.

“And that he…”Jai looked up in shock, “…lives in a crypt.

“A crypt?” Thom laughed nervously. “Can’t be a real crypt. Probably means there’s a lot of dust and gloominess. If there’s one thing America doesn’t know how to do, it’s…”

“Use proper lighting!” They chimed together, and laughed.

“What’s his mission?” Ted Allen, the group’s Food and Wine Connoisseur, asked.

“Says here that he’s in love with a woman, but she broke up with him, and he wants her back.”

“Aww,” they all said.

“What’s the girl’s name?” Thom asked.

Jai snickered. “Buffy Summers.”

“What kind of name is Buffy?” Kyan asked.

Ted sighed dramatically. “If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times. Never let a new mother on drugs name the baby.”

“Hmm…says here that he’s allergic to sunlight and has a phobia of mirrors.”

“Right,” Carson laughed. “He’s probably one of those vampire wannabes. So very goth, and *so* last year. But if he’s cute,” he added coyly, “I’ll let him suck on me.”

They arrived at the airport, and boarded their private jet. They were on their way to Sunnydale.

Late afternoon saw their arrival where they were met by a young girl with the shiniest brown hair any of them had ever seen.

“Hi, I’m Dawn. I’m the one who contacted you,” the girl said cheerfully. “I know you usually go straight to the guy’s place, but I thought I should take you there since it’s kinda hard to find.” They walked out of the terminal and into a waiting limousine.

“At least she has a normal name,” Jai said quietly.

“Just a few things. You know about his allergy and his phobias?” They all nodded. “Good.” She pulled a duffle bag off the floor and into her lap. “This may seem a little strange, but it’s for your own good.” She opened the bag and pulled out several items.

“Are those crosses?” Ted asked incredulously.

“Yep. You should wear these at all times unless you’re with Spike.” She handed a necklace to each. “Spike…uh…doesn’t really care for crosses so tuck them in when you’re around him.”

Carson snorted softly and nudged Kyan. “What did I tell you?” he whispered.

Thom dangled the cross in front of his face. “The newest in fashion statements…not.”

She looked up at them, her face serious. “Since Spike is allergic to the sun, you’ll be doing most of your work at night. Always travel with at least one other person. Never go out alone at night.”

“Honey,” Thom said. “We’re from New York. We know how to handle ourselves.”

“Yeah, but Sunnydale is a different kind of place. Lots of crime here. Don’t want any of you to get bit – I mean hurt before you can help Spike.”

The car glided to a stop at the gates of a cemetery. “One more thing,” Dawn said. “Spike can be…resistant to change. If he is, just remind him he’s doing this for Buffy. He’ll cave. He always does.”

“Oh my God,” Carson squeaked. “We’re in a cemetery!”

“Yeah,” Dawn said nonchalantly. “He lives here.”

She led them through the graveyard, the setting sun casting long shadows of the headstones. They stopped in front of a gray stone building. “We’re here,” Dawn chirped. “Have fun!”

The five men stood, stunned, as she left them and headed back towards the entrance of the cemetery.

“Anyone else wish we were back in New York?” Carson asked.

Before the others could answer, Thom said, commandingly. “Come on guys. We’re the Fab 5. We cannot be daunted. Who’s with me?”

“We are,” the others shouted.

“Who the hell is blathering outside my crypt?” a voice asked as the door swung open. “Oh, right. It’s you pouft…um…guys from New York. Well, c’mon then. Time’s awastin’.”

Carson squealed, all trepidation gone. “No one mentioned he had an accent! How divine!” He sidled up to Spike and slung an arm around his shoulders. “Say for me, ‘Carson, you are the hottest man in the world, and I want to be your sex slave forever’. And look at this coat! I would die for that coat.”

Spike gave him a dark look, shrugged off his arm, and turned to the others. “What happens now?”

“Now, we take a look around,” Jai said as they entered the building.

“It’s a crypt,” Thom said amazed. “It’s really a crypt.”

“Don’t forget the cemetery part,” Ted added.

“What did I tell you?” Carson said in a sotto voice. “Vampire wanabee.”

“Oi, I heard that!”

The five men began wandering around the room Carson ran over to the tattered armchair that sat in front of an old television. “Hi,” he mocked. “I’m so ugly the Salvation Army rejected me!”

“Look at that TV,” Jai said as he crossed the room. “It has knobs on it! I don’t think I’ve ever seen one like that before.”

“You’re not *that* young,” Carson quipped. Jai shot him a dirty look.

“Where’s the kitchen,” Ted asked.

Spike pointed to a corner that held only a refrigerator.

Ted walked over, aghast. “There’s no oven, no stove, no sink! How do you cook?”

Spike shrugged. “I don’t do too much cooking. I’m on a liquid diet.”

Ted pulled open the refrigerator door.

“My stuff’s the red liquid in the jar.”

“Is Buffy on a liquid diet too?”

“Nah. But you wouldn’t know it to look at her, she’s so thin.”

Ted looked thoughtful. “Maybe we should add a pantry with food that she’d like. That way when she comes over, she can munch if she gets hungry.”

Spike’s eyes lit up. “That’s a brilliant idea, mate.”

“That it is,” Ted said smugly.

Carson was still wandering around when he spied an oblong object pushed against one wall. He moved in for a closer look. “Oh my God,” he exclaimed, drawing the attention of the others. “It’s a coffin!” He raised the lid and let out a dramatic sigh of relief when he found it free of any occupants. He crawled inside and lay down, pulling the lid closed.

“Look at me!” Carson giggled, as he pushed open the top and climbed back out. “I’m coming out of the coffin!”

“Carson, you’ve been out since you popped out of your mother’s womb,” Kyan laughed. He turned to Spike. “Where’s the bathroom?”

“It’s downstairs,”

The others followed Spike to the lower level, leaving Ted and Jai upstairs. Jai was flipping through the CDs while Ted was inspecting the contents of the refrigerator. He pulled out the jar full of the red liquid, unscrewed the top and sniffed. He grimaced in distaste. “Ugh. This actually smells like blood.”

“He really does have the vampire thing down,” Jai said. “Although I would never have pictured a vampire listening to the Sex Pistols or the Ramones.”

“Probably saw the Hunger one too many times,” Ted remarked.

Both looked up and gazed into the distance. “David Bowie, yum,” they said at the same time.


The three men, plus Spike made their way down to the lower level. Thom immediately walked over to the bed.

“Wow,” he said as he ran his hand along one of the four posts. “This is really nice. Did you pick this out?”

“Yeah,” Spike said, bashfully, scratching the back of his neck.

“You do have some good taste.”

Spike looked up, pleased. “Thanks, um…” he looked at the other man enquiringly.

“It’s Thom.”

“Thanks, Thom,” Spike said.

Thom walked over and clapped him on the shoulder. “Buffy’s not going to know what hit her when she sees what we’ve done.”


Carson made his way over to what he assumed was the closet. He pulled the sheet aside and stared aghast at the multitude of black jeans, black t-shirts, and red long sleeved red shirts. “Where are the rest of your clothes?” he called out to Spike.

They looked up surprised when they heard a shriek from Kyan. Spike was the first to reach him.

“What’s wrong?” he asked looking around for whatever had spooked him.

“This…” he waved his hand around. “This is your bathroom?”

When Spike nodded, Kyan was aghast. “Reminds me of one of those barbaric showers at summer camp.”

“Oh, I don’t know about barbaric,” Carson mused. “I have some very fond memories of those communal showers at camp.”

They all turned as they heard the others making their way downstairs.

“Wow,” Jai said, looking around. “This is really something.”

“Is everyone ready to get to work?” Thom asked. When they all agreed, he said, “Let’s go to it then!”

The six men emerged from the crypt and into the balmy evening. The limo was waiting for them at the gates of the cemetery.

“Alright,” Carson said, after they’d all settled in. “Spike’s with me first, then I’ll hand him off to you, Kyan.”

“Right,” Thom said. “I’ll be at Restoration. What about the rest of you?”

“I’ll be at Sutton Place Gourmet,” Ted replied.

“And I’ll be at Circuit City,” Jai said.

“Circuit City?” Spike asked, smiling broadly when the other man nodded.

The car pulled up to the entrance of the Sunnydale Mall and they climbed out and stood at the entrance.

“The Fab Five ride again!” Carson chortled happily. “C’mon, Spike. Let’s get you some new clothes.”


“Here, let me help you with your buttons.”

“You’ll do no such bloody thing!” Spike said vehemently, waving Carson’s hands away from his pants, while backing into the dressing room and shutting the door between them.

“Spoilsport,” Carson pouted. “Well,” he mumbled as he stood on his tiptoes. “It won’t hurt to take a peek.”

“You do that, mate, and I’ll be the last thing you see.”

“Fine,” Carson grumbled, then cheered as a thought struck him. “But what a last thing to see,” he said wistfully.

Spike hmmfd but decided not to make a comment. They were, after all, there to help him. He dutifully tried on the outfit Carson had picked for him: gray slacks paired with a black shirt with white embroidery stitched in swirling designs. He stepped out nervously. “Well?” he asked.

Carson’s mouth fell open. “You look absolutely delicious!” He grabbed Spike by the arm and dragged him to the back of the dressing area. “I know you have a mirror phobia, but you’ve got to see your-“ His eyes widened comically when he saw only himself reflected. His head swiveled back and forth between Spike and the mirror.

Spike made to pull away, but Carson wouldn’t let go. “You’re a…you’re a…” a huge grin formed on his face. “Oh my God! You’re really a vampire!”

Taken aback at this unusual reaction, Spike could only stare at the other man.

“Of course I should have known,” he said enthusiastically. “The mirror phobia, the aversion to crosses,” he pulled his from beneath his shirt, delighted when Spike flinched, “and the ghastly pallor. Oh, and let’s not forget the horribly outdated wardrobe.”

He blissfully ignored Spike’s outraged expression. “Oh, oh, will you bite me? I’ve never been bitten before,” he looked at Spike through his lashes, “at least not by a vampire.”

Spike pulled out of Carson’s grip. “I am *not* going to bite you!”

“Just one bite? One teensy, eensy, tiny bite?”


“Fine,” Carson said petulantly. His eyes widened. “Wait until I tell the others. They’re going to die!”

“No,” Spike said urgently. “No telling the others.”

“But why not?” the other man whined.

“Because I asked you not to, okay?” Spike stared directly into Carson’s eyes. “Let this be a secret, just between you and me.”

“Ooh, a secret.” He looked thoughtful for a moment, then nodded at Spike. “Okay, if you insist. I promise not to tell. Cross my heart and hope to die, stick a dreadfully ugly Mephisto sandal in my eye.”

“Good,” Spike said, pleased.

Several grueling hours later, they had chosen a variety of clothes including the gray slacks, a black pinstripe suit, and a pair of black leather pants that Spike loved and that Carson loved Spike in. They’d also collected several shirts and sweaters most in jewel colors, which Carson assured him he looked great in.


“Look, Spike, I know you think vampire-heroine chic is in,” Kyan told him as they stood in the Avalon Day Spa. “And that you have an allergy to sunlight, but really, there’s no reason these days to be that pale. What we’re going to do is have them spray you with self-bronzing lotion.

“You’ll do no such thing!” Spike told him firmly.

“Spike, do you want your girl back?” Kyan asked seriously.

“Well, yeah.”

“Obviously what you were doing wasn’t working, so let us give it a try. If she still says no after we’re done with you, then it wasn’t meant to be. Okay?”

Spike grumbled for a bit and finally acquiesced. “Fine. Do whatever the bloody hell you want to.”

Kyan led him to the back of the spa to one of the enclosed booths. “Now, go in there and get undressed. When you’re ready, push that button and you’ll be sprayed with the tanning lotion. Rub it all over so it blends well.”

Spike looked doubtfully at the booth.

“Spike,” the other man said gently. “We’ve chosen a light tone for you. It won’t give you that George Hamilton look. It will give you a light touch of color.”

“Very light, right?”

Kyan agreed, and Spike reluctantly entered the booth. After removing his clothes and tucked them securely out of the way, he pressed the button. He was hit with multiple streams of lotion. He remembered what Kyan had said and dutifully rubbed it in.

“What do I do now?” Spiked asked through the door.

“When it’s dry, put your clothes back on and come out.”

Spike waited a few minutes, then shrugged into his jeans and shirt and wandered out to meet the other man.

Kyan smiled. “Wow, Spike. That looks great!”

“You think so?” He raised his hands to his face and was surprised to see a difference. It was very subtle, but it did give him a little color. It made him look a little less…dead. “Well, would you look at that,” he said amazed. “Not bad,” he said approvingly to the other man.

“Told you so. Now let’s take a look at your hair.”

“My hair? No way are you touching my hair!”


The others were waiting for them when Spike, Kyan and Carson returned to the crypt. Spike stood, stunned when he got his first look.

There were candles everywhere. Not that that was too different, he thought, but what was were the sconces on the wall, and the tall candelabra scattered throughout the room. Several Turkish lanterns, bolted to the ceiling, were hung throughout. His mouth fell open when he saw the black leather sofa with a matching oversized club chair paired with an ottoman. One of the coffins, now a polished coffee table, a burgundy silk scarf, shot through with gold threads draped across it, and several more candles atop it. Scattered on the floor around the coffin cum table were several large pillows.

“Do you like it?” Thom asked.

He nodded at Thom, helplessly, unable to say a word.

Thom led him to the main room. “We’ve run the Turkish theme throughout. The gray stone walls are a great backdrop for jewel tone colors. I loved the candle effect you had going, so I didn’t change that, just added some more.” He pointed to the hanging lanterns. “There are more of these downstairs as well.”

Jai took his arm and led him across the room to an…entertainment center? An entertainment center with a large screen TV!

“I saw that you didn’t have cable, so we installed satellite. The dish is on the roof, behind the cornice so as not to be obvious. Over here, you’ll see a new stereo. The music that you had didn’t really help with atmosphere, so I added a selection of opera arias.”

“Opera?” asked Spike doubtfully. “None of that screechy stuff, right?”

Jai laughed and slid a disk into the CD player. Dulcet tones emanated from several speakers attached to the wall. “See, not screechy. Nice, isn’t it?” Spike nodded soundlessly. “Now, we didn’t find any source of electricity that we were willing to touch, so we added a generator. They’re no longer the loud, ghastly things they used to be. All you need to do is fill it with kerosene from time to time. That’s downstairs tucked away.”

Ted led him over to the nook with the refrigerator. On the walls were open shelves filled with a variety of foods ranging from gourmet cookies to crackers and chips. Ted pulled open the door of the refrigerator with a flourish. Where his jug of blood had been now stood several different colored wine bottles without labels. An old-fashioned cork topped each.

“That jug was dreadful and had to go. And over here, are new dishes. Can’t have you drinking straight out of the bottle. And this sarcophagus makes the perfect table. I found these low stools that work great with it.”

“Ready to see the downstairs?” Kyan asked.

Spike opened his mouth several times before he was able to choke out the words. “You mean there’s more?”

Carson took his arm and led him to the ladder. “Why don’t you come and see for yourself.”

The bed was transformed into something out of a luxurious harem. Bright scarlet fabric formed a canopy over the bed, the ends swagged to the posts. Thom untied one. “See, you can close them, sort of like a cocoon.” The new duvet was a mixture of rich colors including, red, blue, green and gold. Several large pillows, like the ones upstairs, were propped on the bed and on the floor at the foot of the bed. The oriental rugs were still there, but it looked like they’d been recently cleaned.

Jai took Spike by the shoulders and turned him. Opposite the bed, fastened to the wall was a flat screen TV. Spike sagged against one of the posts.

“Oh, ho. We’re not done yet.” Kyan grabbed his arm and pulled him to his makeshift bathroom. What was once just a cranny in the wall was now transformed. A claw-foot bathtub was in the center. A small vanity with a chair sat against the wall with an ewer and pitcher. Above it was a closed cabinet.

Kyan walked to it and opened one of the doors. “You may have a mirror phobia, but I bet Buffy doesn’t. This way she can fix her toilette and when she’s done, close the doors, and voila, no more mirror.

He pointed to a basket filled with hair and skin care products. “These are all from the Avalon Spa. Just use them the same way I showed you.”

“You added a bathtub,” Spike said stunned.

“I found it in an antique store, and it was no problem really to add some pipe to what you already had there. The only thing that’s missing is a toilet, but I didn’t see a place for it, never mind not knowing how to install it.”

Jai stepped forward. “As you can hear, we also added speakers down here.”

“And over here,” Carson interjected, “is your closet. I had to get rid of that ugly old sheet, and I found this much nicer one in one of the downtown shops.” He pulled it back to reveal the pole from which his new clothes hung. The new additions were the shelves that also held shirts, jeans and new shoes.

“So, Spike, what do you think?”

“I…”he shook his head. “I…no one’s ever…I don’t know what to say.” He walked over to the bed and collapsed on it. He looked up at the five men through bleary eyes. “Is this for real?”

Carson sat down next to him with a bounce. “It’s real. Bet you’d let me help you with your buttons now.”

Spike gave him a small smile. “Not likely, wanker.”

“Ooh, wanker. I like that! And I am one at that!” Carson jumped up. “Come on, Spike, now we have to get you ready for Buffy. Remember, wear the black leather pants with the white shirt and this blue v-neck cashmere sweater. And don’t forget to roll up the sleeves a couple of times and push the sweater sleeves up a bit too.”

“Come upstairs, and I’ll show you what to make,” Ted said as he headed for the ladder.

Once in the upper level, Ted pulled out a tray and several items. “I thought we should stay with this harem theme, so I got some cheese, grapes and wine. Perfect foods for you to feed her by hand.”

Thom walked around the main room. “Don’t forget to have all the candles lit before she gets here.”

Spike nodded, paying close attention to what everyone was telling him.

“Looks like our job is done here,” Jai said dramatically. “If Buffy doesn’t take you back, there are five men here who would have you in a heartbeat.”

“Group hug!” Carson cried happily.

Spike’s eyes widened as he backed away from the men. “No. No group hugs.”

“You can’t escape us,” Thom said as they advanced on him, backing him into the new sofa. While Spike looked wildly around for an avenue of escape, they caught him in their arms. He resigned himself and stood there for a moment, then pushed them away.

“Enough. Enough hugs,” he said gruffly.

They pulled back and smiled at him. Ted patted him on the back. “I think when Buffy gets a look at you, you’ll be getting a lot more than hugs in the future.”

Spike walked them back to the limo, ignoring their protests. “Wouldn’t want something happening to you lot,” he mumbled. He saw them safely into their car and then walked, dumbstruck, back to his crypt.


“I don’t think this is a good idea, Dawn,” Buffy said to her sister. They were in her room, trying on different outfits for her ‘date’ with Spike.

“Please,” Dawn cajoled. “I know things went wrong, but give him another chance. He made you happy, for a while at least and,” she handed a blouse to her sister, “and I liked seeing you happy. I want you to be that way again.”

Buffy shook her head. “I don’t know. There’s so much stuff…”

“I already know this part. He’s a vampire, you’re the slayer. What will your friends think? Blah, blah, blah. Screw all the reasons. You were *happy* with him.”

“Dawn!” Buffy was shocked by her sister’s words.

Dawn gave her a mulish look. “Well, you were.” She crossed her arms across her chest. “What kind of friends are they if they don’t want you to be happy?”

Buffy finally acquiesced. “Fine, I’ll give it tonight, but if it doesn’t work out, that’s it. No more lectures, and definitely no more makeover shows. Agreed?”

“Agreed. But don’t tell me you’re not dying to know what they’ve done.”

“I am,” Buffy sad sadly, “but it may not be enough.”


The Fab Five made their way back to their suite at the Sunnydale Hilton. They grabbed a tray of hors d’oeurvres and drinks and settled on the sofa in front of the TV. With the many Queer Eye cams throughout the crypt, they were able to watch Spike prepare for his evening with Buffy.

Carson grumbled as Spike walked out of view and into the tub. “I still say we should have put a camera smack over the shower.”

“Look!” Kyan exclaimed after Spike walked out…nude. The men were riveted as they watched Spike towel off. He picked up a bottle of body lotion and stared at it. He shrugged and then poured some out and rubbed it on his body. Carson fanned himself.

When Spike was done, he grabbed the gel, and fingered it through his hair like Kyan had shown him. He put the bottle back and headed toward the bedroom. He stopped, a smirk crossing his face as he looked directly at the camera and held his arms out and twirled in a circle. He faced the camera and raised an eyebrow.

The men laughed in surprise.


Spike chuckled as he headed to his closet. Hope they enjoyed the view, he thought. He pulled out the outfit Carson had told him to wear and slipped on the new clothes. He looked good, and he knew it. He only hoped that it would make a difference with Buffy.


Buffy kissed her sister goodnight, and headed to Spike’s. This isn’t a good idea, she muttered to herself. But like she’d said earlier, she was dying of curiosity to see what the makeover guys had done.


“Doesn’t he look delicious,” Carson drawled as Spike walked into view in the upper level of the crypt. “I couldn’t have rolled up those sleeves any better,” he said happily.

“Ooh, he’s heading to the kitchen,” Ted exclaimed. “I hope he gets it right.” They watched Spike pull out the food and arrange it on the tray. They watched in confusion as he darted outside, cheering when he returned with a rose.”

“I knew that boy had romance in him,” Jai said.

“He can romance me anytime he wants,” Carson replied.

“If only,” Thom said wistfully.

They watched as Spike ran around the crypt, checking all the details. He took a deep breath and rolled his shoulders. His head snapped up and looked at the door, a slow smile crossing his face.


He walked to the door and opened it before she had a chance to knock or kick it in. He was gratified to see her jaw drop when she laid eyes on him.

“Spike?” she said hesitantly. “Wow.”

He gestured to the interior. “Why don’t you come in.”?


“Here she is!” Ted exclaimed.

“Look at her face! I think I just heard her jaw hit the floor,” Thom said happily.

“If she doesn’t swoon…” Jai waved his glass at the screen.

“Ooh, he’s taking her coat!”


Spike took Buffy’s hand in his and led her further into the crypt. “Do you like it?” he asked softly.

“Like is not the word,” Buffy breathed.

“Oh,” he said, his face falling.

“No! I didn’t mean it like that!” She hurriedly explained. “It’s incredible. Spectacular.”


The men cheered. They all congratulated each other on a job well done as Buffy wandered around the crypt, an amazed look on her face.


Spike led her to the pillows around the coffee table and sat her down before heading to the kitchen and grabbing the tray he’d made. He walked back to her, and settled beside her. He plucked a grape from the stem and held it to her mouth. She looked at him through her lashes before opening her mouth, her lips wrapping around the grape and sucking it from his fingers.

He groaned and caressed her lips with his fingertips, before drifting to her cheek and then down her neck, playing with the neckline of her top.

“Spike,” she began. He shushed her and brought his fingers back to her lips.

“Shh,” he said. “Let me speak. Then you can have your chance.” He picked up the rose, and caressed her cheeks with the soft petals. “I love you,” he told her. “I can’t remember a time now when I haven’t loved you.” He brought his other hand up and brushed a strand of hair out her face. “It’s never been easy with us, but still, my happiest days have been with you.”

“There’s just so much badness between us,” Buffy said sadly. “I don’t know how to get past it.”

“Just one day at a time, pet.” He leaned forward and gently brushed his lips against hers. “Look around,” he said softly. “I did this all for you.”

“For me?” She looked up at him with wide eyes.

“For you. Always for you, love.” He brought her hand to his cheek. “Feel the magic when we touch. We can have that everyday,” he said seductively. “Just give us a chance.”

Her eyes filled with tears and her lips trembled. “Okay,” she said softly before kissing him.


“Yes!” Ted yelled.

“We did it again,” Carson crowed.

“A toast to the Fab Five,” Thom said as he raised their glasses. They clinked and turned back to the TV.

They all choked and spluttered as they got more than an eyeful of the couple on the cushions.

“Wow,” Jai breathed before snapping to attention. “We shouldn’t be watching this. Carson, give me the remote.”

“No,” Carson whined. “I don’t want to.” His face brightened. “You will never believe what I have to tell you about Spike…”


A few weeks later, a carefully edited version aired, earning Bravo its highest ratings ever.

The End

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