All About Spike

Double Standard
By Colleen

"Buffy, what you've been doing is dangerous. I cannot see how you could possibly engage in a sexual relationship with Spike. If I'd had any idea that you were so vulnerable, I would never have left." Giles was so upset he forgot to clean his glasses.

"You did leave. And I don't think it would have made a difference. How can I make you understand? Haven't you seen how he's changed? It took me so long, and we've had some rough times, but we're finally in a good place." Her eyes flashed with anger. "So don't tell me I'm making a mistake. This is right. Don't try and ruin it for me."

He grasped her shoulders, trying to force some sense into her. "Whatever attraction you feel towards him, you must understand, he is a demon. Fundamentally, he cannot change. His prime motivation will always be evil, no matter how the chip modifies his behaviour."

Buffy looked him in the eyes. "His chip doesn't work on me."

"Buffy, the danger. How can you..."

"He loves me. He won't hurt me." She shrugged off his grasp. "And I love him." She turned away from Giles and started up the stairs. "You know how to let yourself out." She wished she were as determined as she sounded. Giles words had shaken her more than she wanted to admit. Every issue she had faced, every fear she had conquered, came flooding back. She trusted the opinion of her watcher above all others. If he were right, if she were deluding herself... but hadn't she already gone too far? How could she turn back from Spike's love? God help her, she didn't want to.

*****

Giles walked through the front door of the magic shop. Anya, alone in the store, turned at the sound of the tinkling bell. "Anya, I heard what happened at the wedding. I...." His words were cut off as she threw herself into his arms.

"Giles, I'm so glad you're here."

He stroked the top of her head. "I am so, so, sorry, dear. The boy is a damned fool." He looked down into her face. She looked up at him with moist, lonely eyes.

*****

Buffy was surprised to find the door to the Magic Box locked in the middle of the afternoon. She pulled out the key Anya had given her in case she needed supplies in the middle of the night (just write down anything you take) and opened the door. Anya was nowhere to be seen. At the sound of moaning in the back room, Buffy approached cautiously. She quietly entered, and stopped in shock. Anya and Giles were entwined on the training mats, making love. Buffy backed out of the room, the memory of their naked bodies burned into her retina. At least they had been too involved with each other to notice her.

Giles and the ex-vengeance demon. Demon. She quietly locked the front door and headed down the road, towards the cemetery, towards the crypt. Her heart was her guide, and she finally trusted its leadership. As always, it led her to him.

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